


Sharlom Hobes and the bookthief

by Napstaspook



Category: Sharlom hobes
Genre: Crack, Gen, Original Character(s), Original Fiction, Parody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-13
Updated: 2018-10-13
Packaged: 2019-08-01 14:19:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16286225
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Napstaspook/pseuds/Napstaspook
Summary: We do not kill Sharlom Hobes.





	Sharlom Hobes and the bookthief

You'd think that the big ass clock-tower of London, also known as the Big Ben, were off-limits for such world known criminals like The Bookworm and Tick-Tock Man - but nooo, this giant tower of clockwork was in indeed their newest hideout, and god knows how they managed that. Not only is the Big Ben _always_ surrounded by tourists and troops working directly for the queen herself, it's also located in the heart of London right next to the royal castle! How dumb must they be to choose such a compromising location? And how in the world did they have the brains to actually pull it off?

But this was all useless speculation of a man stuck in a trap made of - believe it or not - torn out pages from BAD POETRY BOOKS.

Sharlom Hobes was a private investigator in London, solving crimes like murder and stolen goods, and this particular mission was a bit of both. A few nights ago a rare book was stolen and a dear friend of the owner killed. And when the local police left the case cold, they brought it to Sharlom Hobes.

Bookworm’s trap had the torn pages taped together into ropes that hugged tightly around the trapped detective. Barely anything of the pages was still comprehensible, but of what he could read he understood why these particular pieces poetry was chosen for their fate. He had originally wondered why The Bookworm would only use materials made of books when his life goal was to preserve them, but then he figured it out; The Bookworm wanted to rid the world of all bad litterature in existence too! Protect the good, destroy the bad.

‘’Sharlom Hobes, I see the words finally got to you.’’ The Bookworm laughed, clearly pleased by his attempt of a pun.

The detective just rolled his eyes about to say something insulting back, when the villain in question gagged him with another piece of torn out book pages, making the detective choke on his words.

‘’What you didn’t like the poetry? I’m sure I can find something more tasteful.’’ The Bookworm smirked while flipping the pages through another bad poetry book.

‘’Why don’t we just kill him?’’ The Tick-Tock man suddenly came forward from a dark corner. ‘’You always give him opportunity to escape, or worse; stop us!’’ The Tick-Tock man raised his clock-gun, loaded with probably something clock related, and pointed it at the detective.

‘’NO!’’ the Bookworm yelled and slapped the gun away, it broke in several pieces as it hit the floor, as fragile as the clockwork in the gun was. ‘’You don’t get it, WE DO NOT KILL SHARLOM HOBES!’’

‘’But why the clock not,’’ The Tick-Tock man huffed, staring angrily at his fellow partner in crime.

‘’There are... th-there are rules!’’ The Bookworm started uncertainly, ‘’I’m the boss in this operation, and if you don’t like how I do things then leave!’’

‘’Rules?’’ The Tick-Tock man raised an eyebrow, ‘’I thought you said we were partners! And did you forget this was originally MY hideout? We’re in a giant clock remember?’’

‘’OK THEN I WILL LEAVE, and since MY trap was what caught Sharlom Hobes in the first place... he comes with me.’’ The Bookworm smiled deviously.

‘’Fine, I couldn’t care less about the idiot any-- wait he’s gone!’’ The Tick-Tock man exclaimed and pointed to the remains of the broken book trap.

‘’WHAT!’’ The Bookworm stirred and turned to his captive that was no longer there, ‘’WHERE IS HE? FIND HIM!’’ he ordered and looked frantically around the room for his lost nemesis.

‘’Told you so,’’ The Tick-Tock man rolled his eyes, ‘’You let him escape and now he’ll be here with a troop of royal guards any minute! We have to--’’ The Bookworm hit his partner with a giant book to the head, leaving the fellow crook unconscious on the floor. ‘’Not we, I’’ The Bookworm muttered and ran for the exit.

Sharlom Hobes who was hiding under a nearby table let out a deep breath, ‘’dang that was close.’’


End file.
